All the little bullies in bully-ville

 

1 John 2:9

King James Version (KJV)

 ⁹He that saith he is in the light, and hateth his brother, is in darkness even until now.


I usually don't  quote the King James Version of the bible for many reasons, but this time it seemed appropriate.  Those of you that know me at all know I think protecting "the smaller" from bullies is one of the greatest things we can do. Also turning those bullies into gentle beings to create less bullying would be pretty awesome .

I've been trying to write this for a few days and can't seem to get it out. I've tried to shove it aside for later and can't seem to write anything else because this comes into my mind every time I try to write. How do we stop bullies? Sometimes I think we need to look into ourselves. Do we bully by not speaking up? Do we bully by trying to gloss over whats really going on and "fix" the easy "fix" and ignore the real problem??

Here is the story in short that keeps being stuck in my heart and head. A music teacher changed the word "gay" to "bright" while teaching young students Christmas songs for a school program. Apparently there were several children who kept giggling every time the word "gay" came up.

A lot of queer groups I follow posted about this.  Every one kept posting about "duh, the word has multiple meanings".  Folks kept saying that the teacher missed a chance to educate students on word meanings.

Really? What about a chance to teach respect and anti-bullying? What about the kid sitting next to the whisperers and gigglers that already knows he is "different"? What about the little girls sitting behind them that has two moms?

I knew at that age that I was gay. I may not have known what the word meant and I may not have known all the implications, but I did know it was little girls not little boys I wanted to chase around the play ground.

In my humble opinion those kids were bullies. May not have meant to be, but the giggling and snickering was putting some one else down. The teacher was a bully too. The teachers reaction let those kids know that there is something wrong with the word "gay".

I'm not a parent or an educator. I can't even begin to imagine what it is like trying to mold young minds. So do I have an answer to what exactly should have been said? Sadly no I don't and I wish I did.

I do know that more then the broh haha that this has brought up....more then "keeping tradition"  more then educating about words, we need to think about the kids that just had it reinforced by an adult, that gay is wrong.


Giggles , snickers, elbowing a buddy, knowing looks...... they can hurt. It may seem child like, it may seem innocent but its a form of bullying. Its where it starts.  The teacher knew it wasn't simply nothing or they wouldn't have changed the words.
 We all know its not just "nothing" or it wouldn't have been posted all over facebook.  It's not just about the word....its not about teaching the different meanings of words (all though that is a good thing) its about not keeping silent when there are bullies around you.

Some of my heroes, and I can still see their faces, are a group of queer UVA students from about mmm 1985.  (At that time I think it was just called the Gay Student Union)  One of the verses to the school song is:

That good old song of Wah-hoo-wah--we'll sing it o'er and o'er

It cheers our hearts and warms our blood to hear them shout and roar

We come from old Virginia, where all is bright and gay

Let's all join hands and give a yell for the dear old UVa.

Needless to say when the word "gay" is sung there is a mighty roar of NOT GAY! I had season tickets to go to the women's and men's basket ball games and also went to a lot of football games. I would cringe when I heard this. Then one game, a few students proudly stood and screamed "I'M GAY" as an echo to the not gay roar.

Can you imagine what courage this took to stand up in a crowded stadium, in the middle of your classmates, in the 80's no less and yell this? Some of them may have forgotten this event, I don't know, but it was a turning point in my 16 year old heart. I promised to never shy away from who I was. It took almost 10 years between an event very similar to the one in the news and for me to see those students proudly yell, to know I was ok.


Are you offended? Defensive? Mad? If so good, do something about it! If not, your not listening hard enough.


For our friends that like to quote Leviticus at us all the time....here is one from there :

Leviticus 19:18

King James Version (KJV)

 ¹⁸Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD.

OK...I'm off my soap box now and my normal sweet self will reappear tonight or tomorrow, but I had to share my thoughts on this.